Usted and ustedes take third-person verbs: usted habla, ustedes hablan. They began as vuestra merced, “your grace”.
Short answer: Spain uses tú widely, even with strangers of similar age; usted for older people and formal settings. Much of Latin America uses usted more, and in some countries (Colombia, Costa Rica) even between friends. In Argentina and Uruguay, vos replaces tú.
The same sentence with each “you”
The same question, “Do you speak English?”, five ways. Usted and ustedes take the verb form for “he” and “they”, because they began as vuestra merced, “your grace”: a polite way of speaking about the listener in the third person. The same choices exist in English; compare with our guide to formal letters in English.
tú
¿Túyouhablasspeakinglés?English
too AH-blahs een-GLES
Friend, one person.Spain and most of Latin America. The pronoun tú is usually dropped, since hablas already shows who.
vos
¿Vosyouhablásspeakinglés?English
bos ah-BLAHS een-GLES
Friend, one person.Argentina, Uruguay, Paraguay and much of Central America. The stress moves to the ending: hablás.
usted
¿Ustedyouhablaspeaksinglés?English
oos-TED AH-blah een-GLES
Polite, one person.Everywhere. Habla is the “he/she” form of the verb.
vosotros
¿Vosotrosyou-allhabláisspeakinglés?English
boh-SOH-trohs ah-BLAIS een-GLES
Friends, several people.Spain only. Latin America uses ustedes for every group.
ustedes
¿Ustedesyou-allhablanspeakinglés?English
oos-TEH-des AH-blan een-GLES
Several people.Formal in Spain; for everyone, friends included, in Latin America. Hablan is the “they” form.
Usted changes the whole sentence
Switching from tú to usted changes more than one word. The verb takes the “he/she” form, the object pronoun (the short word for “you” as the person something is done to or for) becomes lo, la or le, and the possessive (“your”) becomes su.
Mixing the two (usted tienes, usted … tu) sounds jarring to native ears, so switch every link at once.
tú
¿Tienes(you) havetuyourpasaporte?passport
TYEH-nes too pah-sah-POR-teh“Do you have your passport?”
usted
¿Tiene(you) havesuyourpasaporte?passport
TYEH-neh soo pah-sah-POR-teh“Do you have your passport?”
tú
Teto-youllamo(I) callmañana.tomorrow
teh YAH-moh mah-NYAH-nah“I’ll call you tomorrow.”
usted
Leto-youllamo(I) callmañana.tomorrow
leh YAH-moh mah-NYAH-nah“I’ll call you tomorrow.”
tú
Vencomeporthroughaquí.here
ben por ah-KEE“Come this way.”
usted
Vengacomeporthroughaquí.here
BEN-gah por ah-KEE“Come this way, please.”
Everyday, standard and formal words
English
Colloquial
Standard
Formal
money
work
to eat
friend
to understand
great
to ask for
to start
Colloquial words vary a lot by country: guay (Spain), chévere (Venezuela, Colombia), padre (Mexico), copado (Argentina) all mean “cool”. See the Spanish-speaking world.
Opening and closing messages
Friends
Opening
Closing
Colleagues
Opening
Closing
Formal
Opening
Closing
One request, three registers
Asking someone to send a document. Every word has its English meaning underneath.
Colloquial
¿Meto-mepasasyou-passelthedocumento?document
meh PAH-sahs el doh-koo-MEN-toh“Can you send me the document?”
Why:tú, and pasar for “send”: friendly and direct.
KYEH-reh deh-HAR oon rreh-KAH-doh · “Would you like to leave a message?”
Softening a request
Quiero → quería → querría
Spanish makes a request more polite by moving the verb further from the present: imperfect, then conditional, then the past subjunctive. Read the ladder from direct to most polite.
Direct
QuieroI-wantun café.a coffee
KYEH-roh oon kah-FEH · “I want a coffee.”
Softer
QueríaI-was-wantingun café.a coffee
keh-REE-ah oon kah-FEH · “I’d like a coffee.”
Polite
QuerríaI-would-wantun café.a coffee
keh-RREE-ah oon kah-FEH · “I would like a coffee.”
Very polite
QuisieraI-might-wantun café.a coffee
kee-SYEH-rah oon kah-FEH · “I should like a coffee.”