Joke formats
Treffen sich zwei…, Kommt ein Mann…
German jokes open with fixed formulas, often with the verb first, which signals “a joke is coming”, much like “A man walks into a bar”.
Treffen sich zwei…Two … meet
Treffen sichmeet each-otherzwei Schnecken.two snails
Kommt ein Mann zum Arzt…A man goes to the doctor
Kommtcomesein Manna manzum Arzt.to-the doctor
Was ist der Unterschied zwischen…?What’s the difference between…?
Waswhatistisder Unterschiedthe differencezwischen…?between
Sagt der eine zum anderen…Says one to the other
Sagtsaysder einethe onezum anderen…to-the other
Was ist … und …?What is … and …?
Waswhatistisgelbyellowundandkann nicht schwimmen?can’t swim
Words for kinds of humour
Schadenfreude, Galgenhumor, Fremdscham
German has single words for feelings English needs a sentence for. Several have been borrowed into English.
The deadpan style
Understatement and a straight face
Much German everyday humour is ironic understatement, said without a smile. The comedian Loriot made it an art form. Here is how a dry German reacts, and what they really mean.
| Situation | They say | They mean |
|---|---|---|
| A storm destroys the garden | Nicht ideal.not ideal | A disaster. |
| A three-hour train delay | Läuft bei der Bahn.it runs at the railway | The railway is a mess, as usual. |
| A stunning view from the Alps | Kann man so lassen.you can leave it like that | This is wonderful. |
| Delicious food | Nicht schlecht.not bad | Excellent. |
| A friend arrives two hours late | Na, auch schon da?well, already here too? | Finally! You’re very late. |
| Pouring rain on holiday | Typisch.typical | Of course it’s raining. |
Characters and traditions
Fritzchen, the Ostfriesen and the Büttenrede
Stock characters and carnival speeches are the backbone of traditional German joking.
FritzchenThe cheeky schoolboy of German jokes, always outsmarting his teacher.FRITS-khen, vas ist DRAI plus DRAI · “Fritzchen, what’s three plus three?”
Fritzchen,little-Fritzwaswhatistisdreithreeplusplusdrei?three
Die OstfriesenPeople from East Frisia on the North Sea coast, the classic target of jokes about slow thinking. They now sell Ostfriesenwitze books themselves.KENST doo dain SHOHN · “Have you heard this one?”
Kennst duknow youdentheschon?already
Die BüttenredeA rhymed satirical speech given from a barrel-shaped pulpit at carnival, mocking politicians and local life.TAY-te-ray · “Ta-da-da!”
Täterä!fanfare
Puns and wordplay
Der Kalauer
A Kalauer is a groan-worthy pun. Germans love to complain about them and tell them anyway.
Animal punvas ZAAKT ain HAI tsum AN-de-ren · “What does one shark say to the other?”Answer: Hai! It sounds like English “Hi!”
Waswhatsagtsaysein Haia sharkzum anderen?to-the other
Food pundas ist meer VURST · “I couldn’t care less.”Literally “that’s sausage to me”. Often punned with Käse (cheese) too.
Dasthatistismirto-meWurst.sausage
Name punikh bin ain ber-LEE-ner · “I am a Berliner.”Kennedy’s 1963 line; a Berliner is also a jam doughnut. The joke is a myth, but Germans still enjoy it.
IchIbinamein Berliner.a Berliner
Compounddair DRAI-kay-ze-hohkh · “a little kid”Someone “three cheeses tall”.
der Dreikäsehochthe three-cheeses-high
Irony and dry humour
Na toll!
German irony is often flat in tone: the words are positive, the meaning is not.
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